After the death of our son Kevin, my husband and I reached out to BFO Toronto for support. I will never forget the voice on the other end of the phone when I finally mustered up the nerve to call. It was the voice of compassion and understanding.
At first, we made the effort to drive to Toronto to attend the monthly drop-in, then joined a mixed group. When the group finished, I felt as though I was still missing something and that’s when I called BFO Durham. I attended a Mom’s group and my husband attended a Dad’s group. It was there that the healing began and friendships were created.
It has been a long 12 years with many ups and downs, but throughout our journey the people who came into our lives, who we would not otherwise have met, are extremely special and exceptional . I can say without a doubt that we would not be in a place of acceptance if it had not been for BFO Durham. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for just “being"

My first experience with BFO-Durham was the Angels’ Tree Lighting Ceremony which took place 6 months after the death of my nephew, Kevin. My sole reason for attending this event was to support my sister, brother-in-law and godson in their recent loss, never realizing that I would become so involved with BFO-Durham through fundraising events, programs such as Family Support Nights and The Walk to Remember, as recording secretary for the Board and now as a Board Member.

I cannot imagine the pain and anguish bereaved parents feel on a daily basis, I can only surmise.

Being involved for the past 18 years as a bereaved aunt has made me realize that there is a great need for volunteers at BFO-Durham, whether one is a bereaved parent or not, to assist in the daily tasks so needed by this organization. The rewards reaped by volunteering in order to keep BFO-Durham alive really do outweigh the time freely given.

Mother To Mother – Easter 1989. I am a young Religion teacher in a high school. I have two children of my own; happy, well, secure, oblivious. Suddenly I am badly shaken by the news that Kristina Hendricks, a vibrant, lively young lady who sat in the front row of my Grade 9 class, has been killed in a car accident.

I attend the visitation, greet her mother, Sue, and our eyes meet, mother to mother. Agony. It is the worst, I think, the worst. How can she live through it? How will she survive?

Summer 1998. My own eleven year old son David has just died. Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Amid the exhausting relentlessness of my grief, I think of Sue, of Kristina, of the connection forged by loss. During the past years, Sue's legacy to her daughter has been, I am aware, to bring Bereaved Families of Ontario to Durham Region. As a founding member of the Durham Affiliate, Sue has carried her own grief with creative and healing energy. Because of her and her associates, there is a place where I, as a newly bereaved parent, will now be welcomed, mother to mother, with compassion and understanding.

I pick up the phone.

I am still here. On Sue's behalf, in memory of Kristina and David, I am now here for the bereaved parents who, sadly, are to come.